This Ritual Life Archive
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Hearing of Death…
Jews respond to a death, either upon hearing the news or at the time of burial,
with the ritual of kriah, in which mourners tear their clothing. The tearing of
cloth: what a powerful image. Cloth is made by weaving together numerous
strands. Each individual strand is flimsy and weak, but woven together, they
become strong and resilient. Such is human life – each one of us, alone, is like
a thin thread, easily broken and able to support only a tiny portion of the weight
of the world Woven together, in family, friendship and community, our strength
is multiplied and enhanced. When a person dies, a hole is torn in the weave.
Just one person – one thread – but how many threads are severed.
The shock when you hear that someone who you have known has died is often
followed by a silence. That sinks in and wraps itself around the heart. Then,
there comes a moment when the grief begins to grope for words.
Ritual:
Kriyah: As you heart is torn, so you tear your clothing.
When the period of mourning comes to an end, some mend the clothes they
have torn and donate them to charity; others wear them on the yahrtzeit as a
remembrance.
Blessing:
(Even upon hearing bad news, the worst news of all, we still bless God)
Barukh atah Adonai Eloheinu melekh ha-olam, dayan ha-emet.
Praised are You, the Judge of the truth.
Teaching:
"…Saul and his son Jonathan are dead…David took hold of his clothes and
rent them, as did all who were with him. They lamented and wept, and they
fasted until evening for Saul and his son Jonathan."
(II Samuel: 4:11)
Havineinu
Give us the wisdom to know your ways,
Open our hearts to your awesome wonders,
Bring us to redemptive forgiveness,
Raise us beyond our pains,
Give us pastures on the meadows of your land,
Gather us form the four corners of the earth,
Correct the erring by your fair judgment,
Raise your hand against the evil,
May the righteous rejoice in the rebuilding of Jerusalem,
The repair of your sanctuary,
The bursting forth of pride in your service,
Preparing the world with the light of your anointed one,
Answer us, even before we have found the words to speak to you,
Blessed are You, God of Being, who answers prayer.
Baruch dayan emet.
Blessed is the Judge of truth.
(CLAL Faculty)
CLAL's National Jewish Resource Center develops and publishes rituals that
help to bridge the gap between our contemporary lives and the ancient wisdom of the Jewish
tradition. We invite you to become a partner with us in thinking about the place of ritual
in our lives and in developing new ritual resources for our time. If you are interested in
being part of this exciting endeavor, visit with us in the Ritual Resource Area
of the CLAL website by clicking here.
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